Poop...yup...poop

Poo...yup, it happens.



I have debated about writing this one for a while but I feel the need to let people know the funny stuff that happens when raising a kid let alone a kid with disabilities.  I will warn you this will get gross as I explain my thoughts when dealing with this incident.

Like most parents of a handicapped kiddo, you really don’t get a lot of date nights so when they came around you really have to make the most out of it.  Kathy and I had the opportunity to go out with a bunch of old friends from high school and jumped at the opportunity when our neighbor Casey said she would babysit Maggie as well as Dan and Kate.  Casey was an awesome teenager who was one of the few, if not the only, teens not afraid to take care of Maggie and watch her on occasion.  Kathy and I were thrilled.  We got cleaned up, put on our fancy clothes (jeans and a button down) and look forward to a good time throwing back drinks and reminiscing about the glory days.  Well, it goes to say that we both tied one on and were dropped back off at home by friends.

We walk in the house and see Casey watching TV by herself.  What runs through my head…”Awesome!!!  All the kids in bed so we can crash and sleep in!!!”  We pay Casey, send her on her way and head upstairs to check on the kiddos.  We check on Dan…sound asleep.  We check on Kate…too cute, awesome, sound asleep.  We check on Maggie…holy crap…literally.

I have to preface the rest of this story with a statement that Mags had one quality I did not appreciate at all.  She had no aversion to poop.  It didn’t smell bad to her.  She didn’t see it as disgusting.  It was just a lump of clay.  She didn’t mess with it much but if left alone for a while, it became an art project.

I crack open the door to Maggie’s room and it was as if I stuck my nose into a horse’s behind.  The smell alone would have floored a lesser man.  I had cleaned up poo hands and a smear here or there before.  Heck, I had even cleaned up a runny diaper or two.  I admit, I usually just yelled, “OG, this one has your name on it.”  Nothing prepared me for what I was exposed to that night.  I went to flip on the light and as I did my hand was coated with poop from the light switch.  There are things a person can’t “unsee” or “unsmell” but that room was one I wish I could. 

Kathy and I immediately looked for Maggie.  She was on the other side of the bed, curled up like a cute little bean, naked and covered head to toe in poop.  It was as if she had covered herself like a hippo does with mud to stay cool or warm, whichever, but it truly does matter.  My little poop bean…innocent, smelly, disgusting and cute all at the same time.  Once we found her and she was fine we looked around the room and that is when our jaws dropped.  Maggie must have dropped that a-bomb of poos that night as the room was coated.  Many of you would probably prefer me not to go farther but it only takes away from the story.  It was ground into the carpet, smeared on every wall, on the windows, curtains, on her dresser, on her clothes, on all her toys, in her books, on her bookshelf, the mirror, the door, door handle, in the bed, on every pillow, on stuff animals, on hung pictures, on the base boards and even on the inside wall of her closet.  Needless to say, my deserved hangover set in early.  Kathy looked at me with her big doe-eyes and said I’ll take Maggie and you can take the room then scooped up Maggie and ran for her life.

I ventured down stairs and picked up the essentials (cleaning supplies, wash rags and a bucket).  I filled the bucket with warm water and peaked back into the room wishing it would just go away…nope, still there.  I started at 1 AM.  At first I was like a kitten testing water for the first time.  Dab, dab, dab with the corner of the wash rag in the water.  Dab, dab, dab on the wall.  By 2PM I was a watered down poop tornado.  There was no more lightly dabbing.  It was full on poop battle royal.  I was dunking the rag in the bucket, slapping the rag on the wall with a full on karate kid wax on wax off style.  Poo water was flying everywhere and I didn’t care.  I must have looked like the Tasmanian devil with my spasmodic cleaning style.  I scrubbed everything.  If it got in my way, it was getting cleaned.  I moved the furniture and pulled up the carpet.  It couldn’t survive the battle.  Maggie-1 Carpet-0.  I finally finished in a sweaty lump at 4:30AM.  With the room clean, the laundry close to being done and my hangover burnt off, I slinked back to my room and that is when I saw what truly matters…

I saw my beautiful wife embraced with my little clean bean Maggie.  They were sound asleep and spooning in my bed.  I now pause and thank God for that memory.  That is what matters.  The love we share with one another.  The sense of belonging and comfort that love brings.  It can melt away bitterness, rage, anger, and pain.  That memory of walking into my bedroom that night will stick with me until my dying day.  A mother’s true love for her child.

Moral of the story may sound corny but it fits…”poo happens” but it’s what you decide to make out of it.  Maggie made it a night of fun and snuggling with her Mom.  OG made it a night of tender love and caring for her child.  I made it a night of turmoil, sweat, frustration and anger until it all melted away with one glimpse of love.  So when like gives you a poo storm, open up your umbrella and find the one thing that can carry you through anything.  Find love.

 

Parting Thought

So I will never claim to be a bright man and I dare say anyone truly know how someone’s brain works in full.  I do know I believe in God and God answers our pleas and calls for help.  I believe God knows our lives and is active every day in them.  Sometimes we see the outcomes and sometimes we don’t.  I have to share I had the most inspiring dream. 

I dreamt I was asleep in my bed with my wife and I see Maggie walk into our room.  She was a full grown teenager but her gait was different.  She moved with grace and ease.  There was no shuffling of her feet with her head down as usual.  It was as if she had full use of her body like she had not before.  As I woke (in my dream), I looked up at her and saw her beautiful face with a huge smile on it.  She said no words and slid into our bed right between OG and me.  She embraced me and we hugged and snuggled like we would when she was here on Saturday mornings.  There was warmth and comfort.  There was a sense of full health and joy.  There was an immense sense of peace.

I woke up with this swelling in my heart.  I felt her love for me.  I felt her peace and comfort.  I can’t explain it.  It was overwhelming in a good way.  I lost all sense of discomfort with her loss.  I only knew peace and joy.  I don’t know if it was just my mind, a true visit from Maggie’s soul, or a movement from God to ease my pain.  This I believe… when I cried out in pain, a sense of comfort was given.  I asked God to ease the pain in my heart and it was answered.  I see it that way and take comfort in it.